October 20, 2021
Did You Hear the Latest? Psychologists Say Gossip is a Social Skill!

Tony talks about gossip as a social skill. According to the article, "Psychologists say that gossiping is a social skill. Here's how to know if you're doing it right," https://www.nbcnews.com/better/lifestyle/psychologists-say-gossiping-social-skill-here-s-how-know-if-ncna1056941 there is a healthy, productive way to gossip. Gossip, according to research, may actually be one of the societal forces that bring us together and […]

Read More
October 15, 2021
Death By a Thousand Cuts - Is it Safe to Explain Your Situation to Others?

One of the most frustrating things after "Waking up to Narcissism" is trying to explain your relationship struggles to friends, co-workers, or family members who haven't experienced narcissistic forms of abuse (emotional, financial, spiritual, etc.). Many people in these situations find themselves almost wishing their emotional abuser would physically abuse them because "at least people […]

Read More
October 12, 2021
How Certain Are You? Exploring Memory Through Popular Myths

How certain are you about the facts of your experiences? Better yet, does it truly matter to be certain? Would you rather be right, or would you rather connect? Today Tony takes a look at certainty through the lens of 50 popular myths that many of us have grown up believing. Tony references the article […]

Read More
October 11, 2021
Escaping the Narcissistic Trauma Bond

Tony tackles the intricacies of the narcissistic trauma bond. For many, the harder you try to find your voice or to separate yourself from the narcissists in your life, the more difficult it becomes, which only makes the bond more challenging to break. Tony references the article "Trauma Bonding - Why You Can't Stop Loving […]

Read More
October 5, 2021
To Be Heard Is To Be Healed - Connecting the 4 Pillars of Communication

Tony describes in detail how his "4 Pillars of a Connected Conversation" works, including how to apply the 4 Pillars in any conversation where you feel stuck, unheard, unseen, or unloved. The 4 Pillars are: 1) Assuming good intentions, 2) Don't send the message of "you're wrong" or "I don't believe you," EVEN IF you […]

Read More
October 4, 2021
Good People Trying to Make Sense of Nonsense (Gaslighting)

Today we tackle why good people look for reasons their narcissist is acting off rather than accepting the situation for what it may be. Plus, Tony describes four types of gaslighting. Please submit your questions as well as your gaslighting examples through the contact form at http://tonyoverbay.com #gaslighting #communication #compassion #therapy #virtualcouch #wakinguptonarcissism #tonyoverbay #tonyoverbayquote […]

Read More
September 28, 2021
Give Yourself A Little Grace, Change Takes Time!

Despite what you hear from the self-help world change takes time, so it is important to give yourself a little more grace. If beating yourself up was the key to success, then we'd all already be perfect! Tony shares his secrets on how to become unstuck, and why we continually try to think our way […]

Read More
September 27, 2021
Narcissistic Awareness Grief and the Narcissistic Apology

Tony gives examples of the narcissistic apology, and he explains "Narcissistic Awareness Grief," a term coined by Dr. Christine Hammond (https://growwithchristine.com/). Tony refers to an excellent article by Diane Metcalf on Narcissistic Awareness Grief https://toolbox.dianemetcalf.com/nag/ Please submit your questions as well as your gaslighting examples through the contact form at http://tonyoverbay.com #therapy #wakinguptonarcissism #tonyoverbay #tonyoverbayquote […]

Read More
September 22, 2021
The Need to Finish Things Meets Procrastination - How the Ziegarnik Effect Impacts Mental Health

Tony talks about why unfinished tasks take up so much emotional energy and why, even with this knowledge, it can be so challenging to begin even the most simple project. The Ziegarnik Effect is the tendency to remember unfinished tasks better than finished tasks. Tony "reacts to" Cynthia Vinney's article "The Ziegarnik Effect? Definitions and Examples" […]

Read More
September 18, 2021
Nature, Nurture or C, All of the Above? The Narcissist Origin Story

Tony answers several questions from the first episode and shares how the narcissist comes to be. Tony talks about abandonment and attachment wounds in childhood that may play into the "creation of the narcissist." And how gaslighting originates as a childhood defense mechanism. Plus Tony answers questions about whether more men or women are narcissists […]

Read More
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram